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Win an IPT Invite

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mRAza

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I am giving 5 ipt invites to someone who can tell best joke. i will wait next 12 hours after posting this thread and choose one from replies.

so lets begin :))


1st Winner : ItsmYarD
2nd Winner :CyberFreak
3rd Winner : lig}{tning
4th Winner : Royal King
5th Winner :zakuza

vizoomer and Protoworker are also winners too but they have ipt already and everybode else is also winner who posted in this thread except rko (jk) LMAo


:)):))

3 more invites added by napps
 
31 comments
Sex in the dark

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figures she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights.
She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device... A vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one. She went completely ballistic. "You impotent ~censored~," She screamed at him, "How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: "I'll explain the toy . . . You explain the kids."
 
ItsmYarD said:
Sex in the dark

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figures she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights.
She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device... A vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one. She went completely ballistic. "You impotent ~censored~," She screamed at him, "How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: "I'll explain the toy . . . You explain the kids."
Click to expand...

ROFL nice one xD
 
No one will win, they're (obviously) all looking up for "best jokes" on Google, how lame. A-holes can't use their brain.
 
hmm ok here comes mine :-

it's not for getting ipt account as i already have one :P
but just for fun :)

----------------------------------

4 Nuns were travelling along the Highway 1 day in their VW Beetle when all of a sudden it all went horribly wrong.

A couple of children had strayed on to the Highway chasing their ball.

As the nun driving swerved to avoid hitting them, she clipped a railing, rolled the VW 4 times into the path of a B Double Truck coming the other way.

Needless to say they all died a tragic death.

On the way to Heaven St Peter stopped them at the Pearly Gates and asked the 1st Nun in line if she had anything she wanted to declare before entering Heaven.

The First nun spoke....." Well yes St Peter, when I was alive I actually caught site of
a mens penis!"
St Peter replied.........." There There my child you are forgiven, wash your eyes with the
Holly Water and pass through the gates."

The 2nd Nun spoke....." Well St Peter, when I was alive I actually touched a mens
penis!"
St Peter replied.........." There There my child you are forgiven, wash your Hands in the
Holly Water and pass through the gates."

At this stage the 4th Nun was looking very upset indeed and piped up to St Peter saying....

"Excuse me St Peter, Do you mind if I Gargle the water before the Sister sits in it?"​
 
Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."
 
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